Stupid Apple Orchard

After dropping L off at preschool the other day, J and I headed to our local orchard.

I thought he would enjoy running around, climbing on the pirate ship, scaling the rope wall and drinking cider.

It takes a while to get to the orchard. It is out in the country in the next county, but since we had a couple of hours, I knew we'd have plenty of time.

Upon arrival, I notice there are not many cars and NO buses in the parking lot.

SCORE!

This means there are not many kids around so I can easily keep an eye on my kid.

Because when they bus kids in, oh man, it is mass chaos. Think Disneyland but at an apple orchard.

For serious.

Anyway, we head inside and purchase a ticket for J to the play area and the animal area.

We walk over there and one other kid is playing who is the same age as J.

Awesome.

They play together for a while and have a big time. We take a break so he (and, alright, me) can get apple cider and an apple cider donut.

Yes. An apple cider donut covered in cinnamon and sugar. It is divine.

After we are refueled, J plays for a little longer, then it's time to go and pick-up L.

On my way out, I ask some construction workers which way I need to go to get back the way I came because I cannot remember.

So I followed their directions and it took me the wrong way.

No worries!

I just turn around to go back the way I came and look for my turn off.

I NEVER FOUND IT.

With my stomach turning into knots, I realize we are lost. I am getting a little worked up.

Okay. A lot worked up.

"Oh do I turn at that tree?" "How about that tree?" "Or maybe that tree?"

Give me a break. All of the trees look alike.

Quickly, I call my step-dad. In a not so calm voice, I explain that I am lost and I need him to go and pick-up L from preschool as I do not know if I will get there in time.

Meanwhile, J is in the backseat saying, "Mama, are we going to get L in time? Oh, I hope we get L in time. I really miss him."

Gah!

Frantically, I call the preschool and leave a hurried message that L's grandpa will be picking him up from school.

While I'm leaving a message, I see an older gentleman walking to his mailbox. I zip the car over to him, roll down the window and ask for directions.

Me: Excuse me. Can you tell me how to get back to town?

Him: *Scratches beard.* Where in town?

Me: I don't care. Just to town.

He chuckles and tells me what I need to know. I hastily drive away after thanking him. I am feeling slightly calmer. We finally make out way back into town.

AND I have enough time to pick-up L early from preschool.

I phone my step-dad and tell him I got it from here.

Cheese and biscuits!

Give me suburbia any day.

At least in suburbia you can say, "Make a right at Kroger's. Or hang a left at Wendy's. Or if you see the Jiffy Lube, you went too far."

Stupid apple orchard.